This year, Ben and I have spent a lot of time learning about goal setting and habits. It's really changed the way we set goals and achieve them. We focus on systems and small but consistent changes that will help us change our trajectory. It matters more where we are headed than where we are right now.
We've actually started having trajectory meetings together, to look at different areas in our life and where we'll end up in that area in five years if we don't make any changes. Then, we decide on a small change to implement to improve that trajectory.
With the beginning of the year, we had another meeting and set some small goals to help change our trajectory. The changes are small, because when you take small steps, you're able to consciously change that long term. Once that small change has become an unconscious part of yourself, then you can make another small, consistent, conscious change in that same direction. It helps you to not burn out the way most new years resolutions do.
Here are my plans for improvement moving forward into 2021.
I'll start with reading, writing, and YouTube.
Reading
I am on a positive trajectory with reading. If I continue as I have, in five years I'll have read a lot of great books, learned a lot from them, and learned to understand those who are different from me. I'll also have set a great example for my kids to continue reading as adults. My goal this year is to read 10-15 books a month. I want at least one of those to be nonfiction each month and one to be a classic each month. I have a lot of great habits in place for this (including times that I spend reading each day, the format that I read in like audiobook and eBook, and tracking my reading on both Goodreads and in my bullet journal). I am not going to make any changes to my reading system at this time.
Writing
I am on a positive trajectory with writing. In 2020, I wrote at least a little bit everyday. I made a lot of progress on my projects and I became a better writer. This year, I am focusing on setting a 30 minute timer to write in the mornings. This is something I started in 2020, but it hasn't become nonconsious for me yet. I also want to read 10 writing craft books.
YouTube
I am not sure what my trajectory with YouTube is. It's been fluctuating the past little while. YouTube takes a lot of time, and I've struggled to find the balance with that in 2020, along with all my other focuses (including homeschool). As I've prioritized, YouTube has suffered a little bit, which helps me realize it's not a top priority for me. This year, my focus will be on staying a part of the community by watching videos and interacting with them. I will record, edit, and upload videos as time permits, but I'm not going to have a schedule or any sort of pressure to to upload videos. I will also probably do more laid back videos sometimes. I also want to stay active on Instagram, as that takes less time while allowing me to be a part of the online writing and reading community.
Now on to the non-bookish parts of my life.
Exercise
I'm currently on a positive trajectory with exercise. I've been doing ten minutes of yoga with Ben each morning. Recently, I added ten push ups and ten squats to my routine. Because this is a recent addition, I'm not planning on making any changes right now. The next change I'm looking forward to making is adding walking and jogging on the treadmill we have.
Family Time
We are on a a negative trajectory with this at the beginning of the year. We were not consistently spending time together after dinner. In fact, our go-to for survival was to turn on a movie. We knew this wasn't a good trajectory, so we decided to start small and do an activity together, even if it doesn't fill the entire evening and we turn on a show afterwards. We have made a running list of activities that are fairly easy to do that we will all enjoy and we keep it on the fridge. We have a reminder on our phones at 5:30 (about the time we finish dinner) to put away our phones and do something together. We've tried it this week and it's worked really well for us so far.
Diet
I am on a negative trajectory with diet. I find it really hard right now to eat well consistently. I am, I should mention, doing better with it now than I was at our last trajectory meeting, but I know I can do a lot better. The one change I want to make right now is to make a list of easy to make meals that I like that I can choose from when I'm not in the mood for whatever meal I meal planned, and then choose from that list instead of getting take out when we're trying to figure out dinner. I think eating out less (things like pizza or take out Chinese) will make a huge difference to my health.
Relationship
Ben and I are currently on a positive trajectory with our marriage. We have a lot of systems for connecting that are working well for us. The change we're making right now is to pray together each night, specifically to pray for help in seeing our children the way God does so that we can parent the way we want to. We have a reminder on our phones and we try to do it right after we put the girls down so I don't get too sleepy or fall asleep.
One change I am making myself as a mother is to read from a parenting book as part of my scripture study. As soon as I'm done reading my scriptures in the morning, I have been opening up How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen on my Kindle App and reading for a few minutes. It's been amazing to see how much more I remember to parent the way I want to, and to see my kids in a good light, when I have that reminder in the morning.
Gospel
We are currently on a positive trajectory with the Gospel. One change Ben and I are making together is to play church/spiritual music more often during the week. We both feel the spirit strongly through music and we think it will bring a wonderful spirit to our environment to do that. Something I am doing myself is to read the Book of Mormon again this year along with the Come Follow Me program. I loved reading the Book of Mormon last year and I just love the Spirit it brings into my life.
Those are the main areas that I am focusing on. I have loved this method for changing habits and becoming better. I've seen a lot of progress and I know that I will continue to get better as I focus on where I want to end up and the small changes I can make to get there.
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