Right now I'm trying to make a fairly tough decision, about what to continue to include in my life and what to leave behind. I currently feel as if I am trying to do too much, but it's hard to let go of anything. Today, I'm outlining the different things I am currently dividing my time between, to get it out of my head and onto paper.
Full-Time Parenting
This includes things like, spending time with the kids (including reading to them when they bring me a book and ask, or listen as they tell me about the picture they drew); making sure they have food, they get dressed, they clean up their messes, they play outside but don't leave our yard; help walk hem through their many disagreements during the day; help them get out things that they need help with; changing diapers, wiping bottoms, cleaning up accidents. Basically, if the kids need something, I am the in charge of it, especially while Ben is working.
Running the House
This includes meal planning, running errands, making meals, picking up the house, cleaning the house, laundry, balancing neighbor friends, planning our schedule, making sure we do family scriptures. Right now, this also includes teaching the kids how to do these things, which often takes longer than if I just did it myself but hopefully will begin to payoff with the kids taking on many of these responsibilities with me.
Writing
I write for at least half an hour a day on whatever book I'm currently working on (this includes outlining, drafting, and editing). I also have times throughout the day when I brainstorm or do research. On Tuesdays, we have writing group. I submit 1500 words on Saturday, I try to read through the submissions on Monday and we meet for an hour on Tuesday. A less consistent part of writing is doing beta reading for certain people (who will then beta read for me).
Homeschooling
Monday through Thursday from nine to noon and Friday morning before I do chores is devoted to homeschooling. I try to be present the whole time with the kids (no doing chores or on my phone or computer while I am with them). I plan out what we'll be doing that week and print/gather supplies for anything I will need on Sunday.
Young Women Calling
I am the Young Women secretary in our ward. We're starting to get things more back to normal, so my responsibilities are growing back to normal now. Those include attending young women's on Wednesday night, helping plan those activities, setting up and attending meetings, keeping notes at those meetings, keeping track of birthdays and getting candy and a card for each birthday. I am also often the one they ask to be in charge of certain projects, especially if it involves technology.
YouTube
I have a YouTube channel talking about writing and reading. I teach writing craft and share my own reading and writing channel. This is what takes the most time and I'm considering dropping it. It's hard to do that, though, because I love doing YouTube and find it really fulfilling.
My responsibilities here include planning what videos I'm doing, prepping for videos (takes about 2 hours a week), setting up to record and recording the videos (takes about 2 hours a week), editing the videos (takes 4-8 hours a week), creating and editing the thumbnails, uploading the videos, watching other YouTube channels and being part of the community (takes at least 30 minutes a day, often more). I have also recently been doing a weekly writing vlog, which requires some filming throughout each day and then editing those together during the weekend.
Connected to YouTube, but separate is my Instagram account. I take pictures (takes about 30 minutes each week), make a quote to share (takes about 10 minutes), post the pictures (takes about 5-10 minutes a day), and interact with others' posts (takes at least 30 minutes a day).
Reading and Bullet Journal
This is what I do for fun, or for myself. I have a bookish bullet journal that I love to create each year and then use the rest of the year. Creating it takes a lot of time each fall, but it's one of my favorite things to do. Then I keep up on tracking all the books I read, the writing I do, and everything I do with YouTube and Instagram.
I also read a lot. I try to read between 10 and 12 books a month (minimum of 10, but maximum of 12). I love reading and often spend my free time on Saturday mornings reading for hours. One of the hardest things with YouTube is that I have less time to read.
Spend Time with Family
Dinner and the time after dinner is family time. Ben is done with work and we try to do something together, even if it's as simple as watching a movie together. Often, we go to the lake, the park, or to visit family. This is usually from 5 to 8, and then we put the kids down. After we put the kids down, sometimes I read, but often Ben and I try to spend some kid-free time together. We'll often talk and make ice cream or popcorn while Ben does the dishes. Sometimes we'll go for a walk around the dead end by our house or snuggle, but most often we find something to watch together while we eat our ice cream. We try to go to bed by 10:00 or 10:30.
Be Healthy
The other thing I try to do that I feel like I'm failing at is being healthy. I try to track my food and eat 40% carbs, 30% proteins, and 30% fats. I also try to make our own food (including things like ketchup and granola, so they have better ingredients), and right now I'm trying to make that a part of homeschool and having the girls help me.
Exercise is the thing I'm failing at the most. I want to exercise for at least twenty minutes a day. I'd love to be doing weights in some way, and cardio. I also want to do 10 minutes of yoga with Ben (sometimes we're really good with this, other times we go long stretches without).
This doesn't necessarily take a lot of time, it's just one more thing and sometimes falls to the wayside despite its importance.
Those are the main things I have in my life to balance. I honestly would find it easier to balance everything if I cut YouTube out, which is why I'm considering it. It's really hard to give it up, though, because I do truly love it, which is why I haven't committed to stopping.
What I'm planning to do is take a break from it this month and see how it goes. When I think of giving it up, I feel sick to my stomach about it. I don't know if I'm getting this feeling because it's the wrong decision, or because I am disappointed to leave it. I think taking the time off will give me better perspective in that area, and give me a break if I do go back to it.
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