I feel like I'm constantly in a torn emotional state.
One part of me looks at my two babies and wishes they would stay this age forever. I never want to lose the snuggles, the laughs, the exciting learning and growing that they bring into my life. I love them in a way I didn't know was possible, And they adore me. They need me. They come to me with bruises and bumps, hungry tummies, and all sorts of disappointments. They fit on my lap, snuggle on my shoulder, and even occasionally still fall asleep on me.
And yet, it's so hard. I'm so tired most of the time. My kids sleep well, but there's still sick nights, early mornings, middle of the night accidents, traveling (when kids never sleep as well), teething, and bad nights in general. There's also the fact that in order to get everything done that I want to and time with my husband, I stay up later than I probably should and wake up very early. It's hard to do much, like date nights and going anywhere, because we either have to haul the kids with us or find a sitter. It's especially hard because Parker won't take a bottle and she still nurses every three hours during the day. Ben and I have time to hang out together after we put the kids down, but we're also so exhausted by then that it's hard to get up the motivation to do anything. And this doesn't even touch on how it can just be hard to take care of the kids: physically tiring to take care of hygiene and nutritional needs, emotionally trying between the fits and crying and demands and constant talking, and all the little things that come with kids (like, ten dirty diapers in an afternoon).
Then I think about having another one. I emotionally want one. We're taking a break right now (trust me, we need it), but there's still that part of me that yearns for another one now. Even with the fatigue of pregnancy, the pain of labor, the horrible recovery afterwards where it takes months to feel normal again, the sleep deprivation of a newborn, and all that comes with it, I still want another one.
And that's why I'm torn. I want to always have littles and I already know that I'm going to miss this stage desperately when it's passed. And yet, there are moments when I'm so excited for it to pass. I look forward to the family activities we can do with older children that we can't with younger ones. I can't wait until long car rides get a little easier. I love the idea of more sleep and less diaper changes. But then my heart whispers to me to enjoy this stage, to hug my babies a little closer.
So for now, I will enjoy the magic of make believe friends, the snuggles when they fall, and the happiness of watching them grow. I know the future will bring it's own struggles and it's own joys, and when those stages come, I'll try to simply enjoy them too.
Tuesday, March 28, 2017
Sunday, March 26, 2017
God's Reminder to Me
I loved listening to the women's conference session last night. It was a little crazy, between kids, but I really got a lot out of what I did manage to hear.
I have been really struggling with our callings lately. Our ward is so small, we have felt like a lot has been expected of us and neither of us have really liked that. With the two kids, it already feels like we have a lot on our plates.
Ben is the scout master/in the young men's presidency. They only have the presidency, so no leaders for Deacons, Teachers, or Priests (because the ward is so small). This means he is gone every Tuesday evening for mutual, leaves for church early every week to help with the sacrament, often needs to take bread to church, and teaches the third hour of church. For me, that means I am at home by myself with the kids during the hardest part of the day (that stretch from their last nap to bedtime), am getting the kids ready and to church by myself, sit in the first part of sacrament with the kids by myself, have to make sure we have bread in case he needs it, and we have to figure out Parker between our two schedules.
My calling is teaching the four year old primary class. I don't like it. Honestly, it makes me dread church. It's exhausting (after an exhausting sacrament of trying to keep a two year old and a ten month old reverent and happy and still). It seems like they don't get anything out of what I'm teaching. I know they might be but it really doesn't feel like it and that's really discouraging. And then trying to do it while taking care of Parker is annoying and hard.
It's been especially hard these past few months because we've been sick so much. I've had to cancel on my team teacher, which isn't fair to her, and sometimes I have had no clue if my class was even going to have a teacher. Then I feel like I'm not doing a good job with my calling, which makes me want to do it even less.
Then there's Parker schedule, which is annoying enough without added callings on. She normally goes down for her hour and a half morning nap between 10:30 and 11:00. And we have church at 11:00, of course. Previously, we've just put her down early at 10:00 for a short nap and woken her up for church, then brought her back for an early afternoon nap when she got too tired, but lately, she won't go to sleep at 10:00. That means one of us has to leave after taking the sacrament to give her nap, because she simply cannot make it much longer without sleep (and she won't sleep on the go, even nursing, for more than a couple minutes ...). If we're both teaching, then that means we either have to do a ridiculous juggling act in which we both miss part of the class we're teaching or one of us has to find someone else to teach right before church.
I've honestly felt it's ridiculous. Our ward has a lot of older couples and many couples who don't have kids yet. And yet, our primary teachers are all moms with young babies and toddlers. I don't understand why they call moms like that to primary.
During the conference last night, one of the talks told the story of a lady with cancer. The way she got through it was by serving others on her "not so bad" days (maybe twice a month). Another speaker told of a relief society president with cancer who served and loved those she was called to preside over through notes, phone calls, and inviting them to her bedside. These stories brought me to tears.
Hearing that really reminded me that I have a testimony that callings are from God. I know my Heavenly Father wouldn't have called us to these callings if we couldn't do them (maybe only with His help) and if we wouldn't learn a lot from them or be able to serve someone through fulfilling our callings.
It also made me think. If those women, who were so sick they couldn't get out of bed, were in such pain, could only serve a couple days a month because the other days were so bad they literally couldn't function, then can't I serve? I do have young kids and am often tired. Church can be difficult and I often feel burned out of my calling. There are many times I have wished Ben didn't have to leave to do his calling. But I am healthy. I have time. I am able to serve. And I know that God wants me to. It was the perfect reminder and motivator for me.
I know that God lives and loves us all. I know that He only asks of us those things that we can accomplish, and that we can, through His help. I also know that while this may be hard now, I will look back on it in gratitude if I serve with the right heart. And I thank my Heavenly Father for reminding me of that.
I have been really struggling with our callings lately. Our ward is so small, we have felt like a lot has been expected of us and neither of us have really liked that. With the two kids, it already feels like we have a lot on our plates.
Ben is the scout master/in the young men's presidency. They only have the presidency, so no leaders for Deacons, Teachers, or Priests (because the ward is so small). This means he is gone every Tuesday evening for mutual, leaves for church early every week to help with the sacrament, often needs to take bread to church, and teaches the third hour of church. For me, that means I am at home by myself with the kids during the hardest part of the day (that stretch from their last nap to bedtime), am getting the kids ready and to church by myself, sit in the first part of sacrament with the kids by myself, have to make sure we have bread in case he needs it, and we have to figure out Parker between our two schedules.
My calling is teaching the four year old primary class. I don't like it. Honestly, it makes me dread church. It's exhausting (after an exhausting sacrament of trying to keep a two year old and a ten month old reverent and happy and still). It seems like they don't get anything out of what I'm teaching. I know they might be but it really doesn't feel like it and that's really discouraging. And then trying to do it while taking care of Parker is annoying and hard.
It's been especially hard these past few months because we've been sick so much. I've had to cancel on my team teacher, which isn't fair to her, and sometimes I have had no clue if my class was even going to have a teacher. Then I feel like I'm not doing a good job with my calling, which makes me want to do it even less.
Then there's Parker schedule, which is annoying enough without added callings on. She normally goes down for her hour and a half morning nap between 10:30 and 11:00. And we have church at 11:00, of course. Previously, we've just put her down early at 10:00 for a short nap and woken her up for church, then brought her back for an early afternoon nap when she got too tired, but lately, she won't go to sleep at 10:00. That means one of us has to leave after taking the sacrament to give her nap, because she simply cannot make it much longer without sleep (and she won't sleep on the go, even nursing, for more than a couple minutes ...). If we're both teaching, then that means we either have to do a ridiculous juggling act in which we both miss part of the class we're teaching or one of us has to find someone else to teach right before church.
I've honestly felt it's ridiculous. Our ward has a lot of older couples and many couples who don't have kids yet. And yet, our primary teachers are all moms with young babies and toddlers. I don't understand why they call moms like that to primary.
During the conference last night, one of the talks told the story of a lady with cancer. The way she got through it was by serving others on her "not so bad" days (maybe twice a month). Another speaker told of a relief society president with cancer who served and loved those she was called to preside over through notes, phone calls, and inviting them to her bedside. These stories brought me to tears.
Hearing that really reminded me that I have a testimony that callings are from God. I know my Heavenly Father wouldn't have called us to these callings if we couldn't do them (maybe only with His help) and if we wouldn't learn a lot from them or be able to serve someone through fulfilling our callings.
It also made me think. If those women, who were so sick they couldn't get out of bed, were in such pain, could only serve a couple days a month because the other days were so bad they literally couldn't function, then can't I serve? I do have young kids and am often tired. Church can be difficult and I often feel burned out of my calling. There are many times I have wished Ben didn't have to leave to do his calling. But I am healthy. I have time. I am able to serve. And I know that God wants me to. It was the perfect reminder and motivator for me.
I know that God lives and loves us all. I know that He only asks of us those things that we can accomplish, and that we can, through His help. I also know that while this may be hard now, I will look back on it in gratitude if I serve with the right heart. And I thank my Heavenly Father for reminding me of that.
Saturday, March 25, 2017
A Hard Day
Is it any wonder why being a mom is so hard?
When, your toddler is a second away from a meltdown all morning. When your baby wakes up and cries anytime you set her down. When your toddler doesn't take a nap and you have to keep going in there trying to get her to stay in her bed? When you bring your toddler down, giving up on the nap, and she continually makes your baby cry?
And, of course, between all this, you have a bunch of stuff you're supposed to be doing, like getting dinner ready for tonight when you'll be gone for the Women's Conference, getting everyone ready for Sunday, and keeping the house managabely clean.
Being a mother is important. The most important thing. But sometimes, it really is hard.
When, your toddler is a second away from a meltdown all morning. When your baby wakes up and cries anytime you set her down. When your toddler doesn't take a nap and you have to keep going in there trying to get her to stay in her bed? When you bring your toddler down, giving up on the nap, and she continually makes your baby cry?
And, of course, between all this, you have a bunch of stuff you're supposed to be doing, like getting dinner ready for tonight when you'll be gone for the Women's Conference, getting everyone ready for Sunday, and keeping the house managabely clean.
Being a mother is important. The most important thing. But sometimes, it really is hard.
Friday, March 24, 2017
A Paid Off House Dream
Since Ben and I have been married, we've been very frugal. We spent money on our honeymoon, when we went on our cruise, but we didn't go crazy (the cruise was $1000 for both of us) and there was a bit of a learning curve when it came to grocery shopping (the first month, I swear we spent like $300 a week on groceries). I learned how to cook and we learned how to eat healthy without spending quite so much money.
And that was good, because our first year and a half, we had no money. We were both in school and just trying to earn enough to survive and pay tuition. It was hard. There were literally months where we lived off of tithing blessings. We would think, we don't have enough money to pay rent this month and then somehow, we always would.
Then I finished school and Ben started making a little more (we went from $18,000 a year to $40,000 a year), so we had some breathing room, but we also had a baby and found Dave Ramsey. We started going through his plan really quickly. We got married in April, found Dave Ramsey a year later in July, and had our emergency fund the next January (this was January 2015, right after Ashtyn was born). Since then, we've put every spare penny towards our house, so our budget is still the same as when we were newly weds.
I'm really proud of us for being able to save so much in so little time. We have made a lot of sacrifices and it's not always fun to have such a tight budget, especially when we're making so much more than we are living off of. We recently bought a lot and were able to pay cash for it and that feeling was totally worth it. I can't even imagine how good it will feel once our house is paid off. So for now, the sacrifice is worth it, but boy, do I have a lot of things I'm looking forward to once we buy and pay off our house.
We'll get a nice fence and have the yard entirely fenced in. This will be so nice with kids.
We'll finish our basement so we can have a school/toy room, an office for Ben away from the family's daily, noisy activities, and a guest room/bathroom. I have all sorts of plans for both the school room and the guest room and I'm really excited for when we can have those all set up.
I'll be able to have a large amount in our budget to put towards books--children's books, eBooks, physical books for our collection. This is one of the things I'm honestly most excited about.
I'll be able to get some more expensive things for our kitchen. I'd really like to move to glass containers, reusable fabric bags for our fruit, and cast iron pans. I also really want some bigger items, like a stand mixer, a second ice cream machine, a second bread machine, and a magic bullet, that are more expensive.
The other thing we want to do that we are waiting on is to get nicer clothes. Even just new clothes would be nice. Jeans, shirts, skirts, shoes, garments, both Ben and I are really looking forward to when we have a budget line in our budget for new clothes.
I could literally go on forever. I'm the natural spender, between Ben and I, and I am really excited for when we have more money to spend rather than save :) We're also really excited for when we can give more. We only give above tithing and fast offering when we feel specifically prompted to, but there are a lot of situations we come across when we wish we could do more. After our house is paid off, we'll be able to, because we won't be in debt (or future debt). No payments means more freedom to do what you actually want to do with money.And that's why we're sacrificing now.
Because we want that freedom.
And that was good, because our first year and a half, we had no money. We were both in school and just trying to earn enough to survive and pay tuition. It was hard. There were literally months where we lived off of tithing blessings. We would think, we don't have enough money to pay rent this month and then somehow, we always would.
Then I finished school and Ben started making a little more (we went from $18,000 a year to $40,000 a year), so we had some breathing room, but we also had a baby and found Dave Ramsey. We started going through his plan really quickly. We got married in April, found Dave Ramsey a year later in July, and had our emergency fund the next January (this was January 2015, right after Ashtyn was born). Since then, we've put every spare penny towards our house, so our budget is still the same as when we were newly weds.
I'm really proud of us for being able to save so much in so little time. We have made a lot of sacrifices and it's not always fun to have such a tight budget, especially when we're making so much more than we are living off of. We recently bought a lot and were able to pay cash for it and that feeling was totally worth it. I can't even imagine how good it will feel once our house is paid off. So for now, the sacrifice is worth it, but boy, do I have a lot of things I'm looking forward to once we buy and pay off our house.
We'll get a nice fence and have the yard entirely fenced in. This will be so nice with kids.
We'll finish our basement so we can have a school/toy room, an office for Ben away from the family's daily, noisy activities, and a guest room/bathroom. I have all sorts of plans for both the school room and the guest room and I'm really excited for when we can have those all set up.
I'll be able to have a large amount in our budget to put towards books--children's books, eBooks, physical books for our collection. This is one of the things I'm honestly most excited about.
I'll be able to get some more expensive things for our kitchen. I'd really like to move to glass containers, reusable fabric bags for our fruit, and cast iron pans. I also really want some bigger items, like a stand mixer, a second ice cream machine, a second bread machine, and a magic bullet, that are more expensive.
The other thing we want to do that we are waiting on is to get nicer clothes. Even just new clothes would be nice. Jeans, shirts, skirts, shoes, garments, both Ben and I are really looking forward to when we have a budget line in our budget for new clothes.
I could literally go on forever. I'm the natural spender, between Ben and I, and I am really excited for when we have more money to spend rather than save :) We're also really excited for when we can give more. We only give above tithing and fast offering when we feel specifically prompted to, but there are a lot of situations we come across when we wish we could do more. After our house is paid off, we'll be able to, because we won't be in debt (or future debt). No payments means more freedom to do what you actually want to do with money.And that's why we're sacrificing now.
Because we want that freedom.
Monday, March 20, 2017
Spring Brings a New Schedule
We have been loving this warm weather! We're outside as often as we can be and (because of nap schedules mainly) I still feel like we're not outside enough. But being out in the warm weather is heavenly, especially with such small kids.
Our inside schedules are basically the same. We wake up at six and I write until the kids wake up, then we all get ready for the day and have breakfast. We're usually done with that around nine or nine thirty. We hurry and do our devotional and then read at least one book together. If Parker woke up earlier in the morning or if it took us longer to get ready, then we'll read longer (because we don't have time to do much else).
If we have time, I'll often take the girls on a walk, with them in the double stroller. They love taking walks together, they sit in their stroller and look at each other and laugh the whole time. We like to go somewhere with grass and let them run around in the middle of our walk.
Then I feed Parker and put her down for her nap. During her nap, Ashtyn and I try to spend the majority of the time outside. Sometimes we have chores or errands, but we do get a lot of outside time in still. We do different things. Sometimes we take nature walks and Ashtyn brings a bag along that she can fill with leaves, sticks, and rocks that she finds. Sometimes we draw with chalk or just hang out outside our front door. If the neighbors are out, we'll play with them sometimes.
Then we have lunch. In the winter, we'd have lunch between 11:30 and noon. Now it's closer to 12:30 or later everyday, because it's hard to want to stop what we're doing. Parker usually wakes up around this time. At 1:30, Ashtyn is down for her nap and I have time alone with Parker.
I like to take Parker outside during a lot of Ashtyn's nap as well. If we didn't do a walk earlier we'll take a nice long walk in the stroller. Parker loves walks. We also sometimes just sit in the grass. Parker puts grass and leave sin her mouth and I take them out. Parker is usually happier outside.
I put Parker down and maybe get a few minutes before getting Ashtyn. Sometimes Ashtyn is awake before I put Parker down again. When Ashtyn wakes up, I sit and read to her on the couch for a few minutes while she's waking up and eating a snack. Then we go back outside. We do the same things that we do in the morning.
Once Parker wakes up, Ben is usually done working and it's dinner time. After dinner, we go in the backyard or to Ben's parent's house or the park. At his parents' house, we play on the grass with cousins or I take both the girls back in the trees. Their house is surrounded by Ben's grandparents' land, which is acres large (I don't actually know how big it is). There's a creek and trees and just lots of fun nature stuff to explore. It's fun. The park we go to is the park that's by the lot we bought and it's a really fun park. It has a music area, multiple playgrounds, and a water spot (it's not warm enough for that yet).
Then bed time and Ben and I get to hang out. We are loving the warm weather and taking as much advantage of it as we can. We're excited for it to get even warmer so we can do more with water and going to the lake and such. We want to go to the lake about twice a week this summer and we want to go hiking more as a family. I want to get a kiddie pool in our backyard again for the girls to play in and let them play with water in containers like I did with Ashtyn last year as well.
It's looking to be a really fun summer!
Our inside schedules are basically the same. We wake up at six and I write until the kids wake up, then we all get ready for the day and have breakfast. We're usually done with that around nine or nine thirty. We hurry and do our devotional and then read at least one book together. If Parker woke up earlier in the morning or if it took us longer to get ready, then we'll read longer (because we don't have time to do much else).
If we have time, I'll often take the girls on a walk, with them in the double stroller. They love taking walks together, they sit in their stroller and look at each other and laugh the whole time. We like to go somewhere with grass and let them run around in the middle of our walk.
Then I feed Parker and put her down for her nap. During her nap, Ashtyn and I try to spend the majority of the time outside. Sometimes we have chores or errands, but we do get a lot of outside time in still. We do different things. Sometimes we take nature walks and Ashtyn brings a bag along that she can fill with leaves, sticks, and rocks that she finds. Sometimes we draw with chalk or just hang out outside our front door. If the neighbors are out, we'll play with them sometimes.
Then we have lunch. In the winter, we'd have lunch between 11:30 and noon. Now it's closer to 12:30 or later everyday, because it's hard to want to stop what we're doing. Parker usually wakes up around this time. At 1:30, Ashtyn is down for her nap and I have time alone with Parker.
I like to take Parker outside during a lot of Ashtyn's nap as well. If we didn't do a walk earlier we'll take a nice long walk in the stroller. Parker loves walks. We also sometimes just sit in the grass. Parker puts grass and leave sin her mouth and I take them out. Parker is usually happier outside.
I put Parker down and maybe get a few minutes before getting Ashtyn. Sometimes Ashtyn is awake before I put Parker down again. When Ashtyn wakes up, I sit and read to her on the couch for a few minutes while she's waking up and eating a snack. Then we go back outside. We do the same things that we do in the morning.
Once Parker wakes up, Ben is usually done working and it's dinner time. After dinner, we go in the backyard or to Ben's parent's house or the park. At his parents' house, we play on the grass with cousins or I take both the girls back in the trees. Their house is surrounded by Ben's grandparents' land, which is acres large (I don't actually know how big it is). There's a creek and trees and just lots of fun nature stuff to explore. It's fun. The park we go to is the park that's by the lot we bought and it's a really fun park. It has a music area, multiple playgrounds, and a water spot (it's not warm enough for that yet).
Then bed time and Ben and I get to hang out. We are loving the warm weather and taking as much advantage of it as we can. We're excited for it to get even warmer so we can do more with water and going to the lake and such. We want to go to the lake about twice a week this summer and we want to go hiking more as a family. I want to get a kiddie pool in our backyard again for the girls to play in and let them play with water in containers like I did with Ashtyn last year as well.
It's looking to be a really fun summer!
Wednesday, March 1, 2017
February 2017 - Books I Read
Murder on the Orient Express by Agatha Christie
This was a for-fun book. In December, I read this book called The Woman on the Orient Express. It was a historical fiction about Agatha's life right after her divorce, as she traveled on the Orient Express and was given the inspiration for some of her novels, including Murder on the Orient Express, which really made me want to read it. Then, my brother got it for me for Christmas (without even knowing!). I finished up some of the nonfiction in January and was able to read this one. I really enjoyed it. I want to read more Agatha Christie books.
The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo
This is a pretty famous book. The "hold it in your hands and if it doesn't give you joy, get rid of it," book. The KonMari method, the one where you fold the shirts the one way. I've been into watching decluttering and organizing videos on YouTube lately and everyone talks about this book and how much they like it, so I thought I'd give it a try.
To be honest, I didn't like it. First of all, she is wacky. Seriously. She treats and talks to stuff like it's alive, a person. I'm dead serious. She thinks you should empty out your purse every night because it's been working so hard carrying your stuff around for you all day and deserves a break. She says that in the book. And it's a common theme throughout the book. I couldn't get past that plus the fact that she talked on and on and kept repeating herself. I think her book could have literally been half as long as it was, which felt like an annoying waste of time when I was reading it.
However, I did get some stuff out of it. One thing I liked was her focus on getting rid of stuff in one fell swoop before putting away anything or trying to organize. I am a big believer in owning less stuff (though I am a natural collector/hoarder, so it's a work in progress). But reading her book did motivate me to go through our house and make a DI run.
One concept that was common throughout the book was the idea of only keeping things that you like (that bring you joy). I like the intentionality of that. I applied this specifically to our books. I love books and reading and want my kids to grow up to be the same, so I collect books. However, after reading this book (and watching some stuff on twaddle--more on that next month, though, since I'm currently reading a book called The Twaddle Free Education), I decided I had some books that I really didn't like. I'm not going to purge my collection down to 50 books or something, because I love books. I like the ownership. That doesn't mean I should keep a book just because it's a book, though. I should only keep books that I really like, that I really want my kids to grow up reading. So, because of this book, I went through our children's books and got rid of any I didn't actually want but was holding onto because they were books. And I actually got rid of quite a few. Now it's easier to find the books we actually enjoy!
The Read-a-Loud Handbook by Jim Trelease
So this was actually a reread. I read this during the summer and absolutely loved it. I think every parent should be required to read this. I have been working on getting a homeschool blog going and this book was very applicable to that, so I decided to refresh my memory and read it again.
The book focuses on the benefits of reading out loud to our children. There are so many! If you only do one thing for your child's education, read out loud to them. The more you read, the bigger your vocabulary, the greater your context awareness (meaning, you understand things like a forest even if you've never been in a forest), and the better your critical thinking skills, which all add up to make it easier and more enjoyable to read more. And again, the more you read ... Children's listening level is actually a few grade levels higher than their actual reading level, so reading out loud even to older children is very beneficial.
I love everything about this book. It reminds me of a paper my newspaper teacher had us fill out at the end of the year. It was a survey type thing. One of the questions was asking about the first book we read and I talked about how my mom would read to us growing up. He commented on my paper that almost every single avid reader and writer (because you don't become a good writer by writing more, you become a good writer by reading more) began with their parents reading to them as they grew up.
One specific point I wanted to mention that I really noticed during this reading was when Trelease talked about television and screen time. His main focus was not on the harmful effects of TV, but rather on the opportunity loss. A little screen time isn't bad, but whenever the child is watching the TV, he isn't doing something else that is more beneficial. This is especially true when looking at how much time a child watches TV versus how much time they spend reading. I really loved this because I've been working really hard at being very intentional about our screen time and cutting down on how often I turn on a TV show for Ashtyn.
And now, because I'm so excited about reading to the girls after rereading this book, we read all the time. After breakfast, we do our devotional (where we read scriptures) and then we pick a book and read it. It's usually a longer children's book. Sometimes we'll read several shorter ones. Parker usually plays for most of it, but she'll stop occasionally to look at the book. Ashtyn just sits and listens most of the time. Then we put Parker down and some days, Ashtyn and I go to the story time at the library, but a lot of time we'll read together just me and her. She really loves this book we have that's a collection of Golden Time Stories. She has her favorites and almost all of them have good sized paragraphs on each page. She will curl up next me and I'll read almost the entire collection. Every time I ask if she wants to do something else, she'll say, "No. Read the next story." It's amazing. Then I put Ashtyn down and have time with just Parker, so I'll put Parker in her high chair for food and read to her while she's in there and she loves it. After I get Ashtyn from her nap (Parker's usually asleep by then), Ashtyn usually asks me to read to her some more (we used to watch shows when she woke up and we still sometimes do, but if I offer to read to her instead, she always chooses that). And then of course, we read to both of them before every nap/bedtime. I love that we have so much time when we can read and that both my girls love us to read to them. I honestly think it's because we've read to them so much since such an early age. We started (with both of the them) when they were not even a week old and haven't missed a day since Ashtyn was three months old (when I really started doing her bedtime routine with a book). And I love it.
Creating Daily Routines by Dolly Freeman
This was a short eBook that I got for signing up for a homeschooling mom's blog. It was really short, but I liked it. One thing it brought up that I really liked was how routines and schedules differ. A routine gives you more flexibility where schedules, because they impose time constraints, are more demanding. I am a huge schedule and routine person, I like things to happen the way they were planned. Because of that, I got my babies on a sleeping and eating schedule as early as possible (brand new newborns physically aren't capable of that, but you'd be surprised how early they are if you gently try). We literally thrive off our routine. We don't have a super strict schedule excepting nap times and bedtimes. It's rare for me to allow something to interrupt those or even cause them to be late.
The main thing I connected with in this book (since we already have a routine that I love set up in our home) was when she talked about "routine robbers". These are things that cause your routines to go out the window. One she talked about was TV. This one is a big one for me. Ben and I have actually talked about this quite a bit, because he isn't as big of a TV person as I am, but I get sucked into it. I can very easily get addicted to TV. There are times in my life when I hardly watch any at all or very little, but once I start watching a little, it's very hard for me to not spend every free second watching it. I have a hard time with moderation, so I actually generally try to just avoid it. When I do get into a TV rut, though, I've noticed I lose motivation to do other things and I end up just doing minimum things (like putting the kids to bed on time and eating something for dinner). It's good to be aware of things like this in our lives.
This was a for-fun book. In December, I read this book called The Woman on the Orient Express. It was a historical fiction about Agatha's life right after her divorce, as she traveled on the Orient Express and was given the inspiration for some of her novels, including Murder on the Orient Express, which really made me want to read it. Then, my brother got it for me for Christmas (without even knowing!). I finished up some of the nonfiction in January and was able to read this one. I really enjoyed it. I want to read more Agatha Christie books.
The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo
This is a pretty famous book. The "hold it in your hands and if it doesn't give you joy, get rid of it," book. The KonMari method, the one where you fold the shirts the one way. I've been into watching decluttering and organizing videos on YouTube lately and everyone talks about this book and how much they like it, so I thought I'd give it a try.
To be honest, I didn't like it. First of all, she is wacky. Seriously. She treats and talks to stuff like it's alive, a person. I'm dead serious. She thinks you should empty out your purse every night because it's been working so hard carrying your stuff around for you all day and deserves a break. She says that in the book. And it's a common theme throughout the book. I couldn't get past that plus the fact that she talked on and on and kept repeating herself. I think her book could have literally been half as long as it was, which felt like an annoying waste of time when I was reading it.
However, I did get some stuff out of it. One thing I liked was her focus on getting rid of stuff in one fell swoop before putting away anything or trying to organize. I am a big believer in owning less stuff (though I am a natural collector/hoarder, so it's a work in progress). But reading her book did motivate me to go through our house and make a DI run.
One concept that was common throughout the book was the idea of only keeping things that you like (that bring you joy). I like the intentionality of that. I applied this specifically to our books. I love books and reading and want my kids to grow up to be the same, so I collect books. However, after reading this book (and watching some stuff on twaddle--more on that next month, though, since I'm currently reading a book called The Twaddle Free Education), I decided I had some books that I really didn't like. I'm not going to purge my collection down to 50 books or something, because I love books. I like the ownership. That doesn't mean I should keep a book just because it's a book, though. I should only keep books that I really like, that I really want my kids to grow up reading. So, because of this book, I went through our children's books and got rid of any I didn't actually want but was holding onto because they were books. And I actually got rid of quite a few. Now it's easier to find the books we actually enjoy!
The Read-a-Loud Handbook by Jim Trelease
So this was actually a reread. I read this during the summer and absolutely loved it. I think every parent should be required to read this. I have been working on getting a homeschool blog going and this book was very applicable to that, so I decided to refresh my memory and read it again.
The book focuses on the benefits of reading out loud to our children. There are so many! If you only do one thing for your child's education, read out loud to them. The more you read, the bigger your vocabulary, the greater your context awareness (meaning, you understand things like a forest even if you've never been in a forest), and the better your critical thinking skills, which all add up to make it easier and more enjoyable to read more. And again, the more you read ... Children's listening level is actually a few grade levels higher than their actual reading level, so reading out loud even to older children is very beneficial.
I love everything about this book. It reminds me of a paper my newspaper teacher had us fill out at the end of the year. It was a survey type thing. One of the questions was asking about the first book we read and I talked about how my mom would read to us growing up. He commented on my paper that almost every single avid reader and writer (because you don't become a good writer by writing more, you become a good writer by reading more) began with their parents reading to them as they grew up.
One specific point I wanted to mention that I really noticed during this reading was when Trelease talked about television and screen time. His main focus was not on the harmful effects of TV, but rather on the opportunity loss. A little screen time isn't bad, but whenever the child is watching the TV, he isn't doing something else that is more beneficial. This is especially true when looking at how much time a child watches TV versus how much time they spend reading. I really loved this because I've been working really hard at being very intentional about our screen time and cutting down on how often I turn on a TV show for Ashtyn.
And now, because I'm so excited about reading to the girls after rereading this book, we read all the time. After breakfast, we do our devotional (where we read scriptures) and then we pick a book and read it. It's usually a longer children's book. Sometimes we'll read several shorter ones. Parker usually plays for most of it, but she'll stop occasionally to look at the book. Ashtyn just sits and listens most of the time. Then we put Parker down and some days, Ashtyn and I go to the story time at the library, but a lot of time we'll read together just me and her. She really loves this book we have that's a collection of Golden Time Stories. She has her favorites and almost all of them have good sized paragraphs on each page. She will curl up next me and I'll read almost the entire collection. Every time I ask if she wants to do something else, she'll say, "No. Read the next story." It's amazing. Then I put Ashtyn down and have time with just Parker, so I'll put Parker in her high chair for food and read to her while she's in there and she loves it. After I get Ashtyn from her nap (Parker's usually asleep by then), Ashtyn usually asks me to read to her some more (we used to watch shows when she woke up and we still sometimes do, but if I offer to read to her instead, she always chooses that). And then of course, we read to both of them before every nap/bedtime. I love that we have so much time when we can read and that both my girls love us to read to them. I honestly think it's because we've read to them so much since such an early age. We started (with both of the them) when they were not even a week old and haven't missed a day since Ashtyn was three months old (when I really started doing her bedtime routine with a book). And I love it.
Creating Daily Routines by Dolly Freeman
This was a short eBook that I got for signing up for a homeschooling mom's blog. It was really short, but I liked it. One thing it brought up that I really liked was how routines and schedules differ. A routine gives you more flexibility where schedules, because they impose time constraints, are more demanding. I am a huge schedule and routine person, I like things to happen the way they were planned. Because of that, I got my babies on a sleeping and eating schedule as early as possible (brand new newborns physically aren't capable of that, but you'd be surprised how early they are if you gently try). We literally thrive off our routine. We don't have a super strict schedule excepting nap times and bedtimes. It's rare for me to allow something to interrupt those or even cause them to be late.
The main thing I connected with in this book (since we already have a routine that I love set up in our home) was when she talked about "routine robbers". These are things that cause your routines to go out the window. One she talked about was TV. This one is a big one for me. Ben and I have actually talked about this quite a bit, because he isn't as big of a TV person as I am, but I get sucked into it. I can very easily get addicted to TV. There are times in my life when I hardly watch any at all or very little, but once I start watching a little, it's very hard for me to not spend every free second watching it. I have a hard time with moderation, so I actually generally try to just avoid it. When I do get into a TV rut, though, I've noticed I lose motivation to do other things and I end up just doing minimum things (like putting the kids to bed on time and eating something for dinner). It's good to be aware of things like this in our lives.
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