Life with Two

Having two kids is both as hard and as fun as I thought it would be, and then some.

Some days aren't too crazy. Those are usually the days when Parker sleeps well. Parker sometimes is a champion sleeper and other times, I can't get her to stay settled. She's still so young that I'm not too worried about that, but those days sure are harder on all of us. Luckily, they're far and few between so far.

Parker has been a great sleeper at night, overall. She's had a few rougher nights, but nothing like when Ashtyn was a newborn. Of course, she's still very young, so she could still have some rough times in the next few months, but so far we haven't had any of the cry-from-ten-to-one-in-the-morning-nights that Ashtyn gave us the first couple of months.

Ashtyn does still struggle with jealously sometimes, but overall, she does great. She absolutely loves Parker. Ashtyn always wants to hold her, kiss her, pick her up (I don't let her do this, but I have to watch close if they're both out on the ground), and pray for her. She'll come over when Parker is crying and say, "It's okay, sister." When Parker is sleeping, Ashtyn always wants to "get Parker," and if we don't, it often ends in a meltdown on Ashtyn's end.

One of the best parts of having two kids is watching Ashtyn mimic what I do with her toys. She loves to feed, burp, rock, and snuggle her toys and dolls. It makes me happy in a way I've never felt before to watch her be so nurturing.

Having to balance my time between two kids has actually made it easier for me to have more purpose in my time with Ashtyn. When Parker is sleeping in the morning, we spend at least a little time either outside or running errands (one of the perks of your husband working from home is the ability to leave the house while your kids are sleeping). We also have begun doing a little devotional and mini home schooling (although, sometimes this happens while Parker is awake). We focus on letters and counting, but I've also been trying to work on Ashtyn's fine motor skills with drawing/coloring and other craft activities. We also read whatever books Ashtyn wants and sing nursery rhymes. I love this time, because it gives me a chance to really connect with Ashtyn at the start of the day, when I'm the least tired.

The hardest part of the day for me is the early evening, especially if Ben is still working or can't be home. I get tired really early, with the middle of the night wake ups we still experience, and Parker is at her fussiest. This usually means Ashtyn is struggling, too, and it wears on me. I usually start off the day feeling like a super mom and ending the day not wanting to do it all again tomorrow.

It's definitely more exhausting to have a newborn and a toddler. Luckily, Parker sleeps better than Ashtyn did, so I don't feel as tired as I did with Ashtyn. I know it will probably get worse before it gets better, but things seem manageable right now, even if I'm tired.

Life is definitely crazier. It's hard to stay on top of things and, although we are getting back into a routine, our schedule is more hectic and more exhausting with a newborn. This phase is so hard for me. Newborns are so exhausting, as adorable as they are, and it really wears on me. It helps me, this time around, getting through it, because I know it gets easier and goes so quickly. I am doing my best, through the exhaustion and double tantrums, to remind myself of how much I'll miss this all when it's gone.

And you know what? It's working.